Tuesday, March 30, 2010

My childhood - teenhood - lost and found

I was desperately searching - on a quest, actually - of books that had marked me during my childhood and my teenage hood.

I have author names, titles, which never quite left my memory : Denis Côté, Joël Champetier, Philippe Gauthier ... but I had these evasive stories which I couldn't remember neither the author nor the title. A pain.

I spent more than 10 years looking - searching - desiring to find them back !

And the heavens have their very own humor.

"The answer is at your feet!" and I quite mean that literally. My personal book library is facing my bed. There is one shelf at the level of my mattress, thus at m feet. On that shelf I have the smaller sized books and "romans" (stories). Tonight, for no particular reason but to check out if I could find anything at all through the Editor's website - not much hope floating around me, though - I took out a book. Le Bagarreur (Bad Boy in it's original title) and so I went on the Tysseyre edition website and nearly had a heart attack as titles from my past re-surfaced, with the same covers as when I was in grade school and in high school. Hope rose a little bit.

Until one page after another I kept on stumbling on titles that I had cherished through out my life.

I thought - and I could have sworn my life on it - that the title of this book I was so desperately searching for - was Un jeu dangereux ( A dangerous game ) but I found the light tonight. It's actually Un si bel enfer, by Louis Émond. Louis Émond - such a French name, how could I have forgotten it ! As a kid, I was very aware of the fact that I was an emigrant from an European country and how these authors had so perfectly French names.

In grade school, I had read this book about a girl, her mother and this man who keeps calling her Alice, while her name is Celia. It spoke of the dead, the afterlife, hypnosis and such. It basically addicted me to parapsychology and the Near Death Experiences and Life after Death themes - which consumed my teenage years. I remembered the story, but I couldn't remember the story - and as I flipped through the pages, I had the most delightful heart beat skip when I stumbled on the cover. Merveilles au pays d'Alice ( Wonders in Alice's country/world). That is the origin and the reason why I am Ailime on the internet. Celia is Alice spelled backwards. Ailime is Emilia spelled backwards ;)

Another one that I greatly appreciated and missed. It's a story about how scientist manage to reproduce a unicorn with the genetic code found inside a corpse found in an iceberg and they want to use the unicorn or it's horn for something bad but a girl saves him and runs away with him - ensues a very beautiful friendship and lessons of life. Clair de Lune


Random titles which marked me as a kid/teen

Le secret de Qader - Le chateau de fer - L'héritage de Qader
Edgar le Bizarre - L'Étrange amour d'Edgar
Panique au cimetière
La requête de Barrad - La prisonnière de Barrad - Le voyage de la Sylvanelle -
Les hockeyeurs cybernétiques
Red Lerouge

Thursday, March 25, 2010

I do "impressive works"

It started at one of the breaks today, the lunch break or the second one in the afternoon. A colleague who replaces me during mybreaks asked me what I would be doing after this current contract at Xerox downtown Montreal office (receptionist contract of 2 weeks) and I said that I had nothing planned but it was a welcomed break because I planned on going to the mountain and take some beaver pictures - hoping that I would actually catch them !

She asked me if I took pictures and I said yes, giving her some of my links (flickr, jpg mag, picasa).

She came back about an hour later, maybe an hour and a half, and she was stunned.

"Did you took those pictures ? All of them ?" she asked
"Yeah..." I replied sort of surprised (of course - i wouldn't have taken stolen shots and claimed they were mine!)
"Some of them are uneblievable !" she continued

And so it seems I have two more fans ! Sonia and Jacques (who both at intervals replace me at the front desk reception during my breaks and lunch hours) are amazed by the pictures I can take !

Sonia was struck by the snails in Ireland and so we had a lil chit chat about my equipment (the 2 Canons ) and the very detail that no I had never followed courses before but yes I had applied to Dawson in photography and was hoping to get an answer eventually. (And I really fucking hope with every fiber of my soul and existence to be accepted !)

I let her know that my pictures on picasa were at a higher resolution and available to be downloaded as wallpapers - she was obviously impressed during the whole chat !

Even funnier detail, she lives in the same quarter as me - on the other side of the commonly shared Jarry park.

Isn't the world a little place, as the French expression says ;)

It also feels awesome - coming from someone that absolutely doesn't know me at all - to hear that that person actually likes and has a high esteem of my work ! It simply feels good to be recognized by an unbiased person. I tend to think - to fall in the trap of belief - that friends are biased and because they are friends they feel obliged to say nicer things or nice things just because. So once in a while - the opinion, expresed words of total strangers is the best thing to boost the confidence and the hopes ;)

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Moxie Dolls

Well, I couldn't resist ! They are cute - they are adorable - they are nice - and they are ... a bit more budget accessible than a new BJD doll - even a small format one so ... and I was simply dyin' to get new models to play around with and pose and shoot and create stories with.

Avery model/sculpt (the cute blondie with blue eyes) has been officially re-named Sybi (as my little puffy girl character) and Sophina (whom I picked solely because she has brown eyes) - will take the role of Sybi's best friend (the Coffee Fairy) and has been re-named Cody.

I dunno yet what kind of stories I will make but I want them silly and humorous like our very literal humor on msn.

On with the piccies !

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More Photos on my Flickr

Official Moxie Dolls website

Dolls of Color - a blog where I discovered these

I was actually watching television and saw the Liv dolls tv add and decided to google them and I came across this blog which showed me even better alternatives ! Moxie girls :D

I wish - and I hope it'll be the case in the future - sets of clothing and accessories will be sold seperately from the dolls ! It was actually hard to chose which model because of the clothes ! ^-^;; I actually ended up buying 2 Avery dolls (one with a chopper bike and 2 sets of clothes), this pink one and Sophina ! A possible combination would have been Avery and Sophina in a box but with a costume I didn't particularly loved and about as many dolls as costumes are shown on the official website under Products - Dolls section.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Video Gaming at 26 y.o

It actually feels quite something, strange almost - I feel like that man in First Descent movie, who started snowboarding at 60 - It feels odd to start serious video gaming at 26 years old.

I installed Unreal Tournament III - the ambiance, the music, the characters - I miss Torch tough... he's not in UT III *sniffles - my Torchie-Pie*

Anyway, in the first game I killed 2 times and was killed about 10 times or more - lol - I got so used to use the keyboard shortcuts for that game, that the actual joy stick feels weird !

But the whole experience - the thrill to see the backgrounds, their type of music, their characters, story ...

Than, I installed Shaun White Snowboarding game and ...

And Shaun White gave me a 9.5 for the balls of doing some ... tricks on snowboarding - I dunno it's part of the game to encourage but holy fuck thanks Dude !! He digs my moves ? W00t !

When I think that I spent 30 minutes or more finding the HQ in DOOM 3 and the dude there said that I was not there to do Tourism ... and I get a 9.5 as a starter with snowboard... pretty clear what type of game I'm made for !

I already had 3-4 run downs the hill, got a pretty good score over all ! Learning to manipulate the commands for more flips and in the air jumps and rotations and it's nuts ! to see the character up in the air, the mountains in the background, the clear blue sky, the sun !! I feel as if I'm there riding that board myself !

*love the soundtrack too !! wanna piece of my heart - wanna be part of the show ? it's classic teen rock sort of cute stuff - I love that cute indie rock angle - it's exactly the underground life style of snowboarders !

I always dreamed to see and to play a game where I can fluidly go down hills, jump and rotate in the air, do tricks and see that white snow all over the place ! It almost feels real. And for once, I picked a girl boarder ! (I always pick guy players to represent me)

This is soooo much better than sex, it makes me wonder why ppl strive for that so much...

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Random Poems

I found these in my folder while putting some order in my texts folder - never shared so here they are -


Poem for Sammael


and though they say you are but a shadow in my heart
who are they to pretend to know the tides in my soul
who are they to prentend to know the waves of passion
which constantly bring you back to my shores ?

who are they to judge our affection
when in their souls love has died so long ago
who are they to critize our promises
when their words are empty and meaningless

they don't know the depths of our love
they don't imagine the pain I suffer
they don't hear the longing whisper of my sorrow
but their ignorant words fly like arrows.

Inspiré par un ciel orageux

Que mon coeur brûle dans le feu de l’enfer
Mon âme à jamais prisonnière
Ta presence, ton existence est mon dongeon

Dans le ciel – l’enfer connaitra ce soir sa gloire
Bouc conduisant fièrement sa troupe
À la guerre s’en va l’enfer.

À la guerre s’en va l’enfer ce soir
Une armée de chevaux de nuage et de colère
Le diable les mène au champ de bataille
Loups voraces, affamés, courent dans la nuit tombante
L’enfer sera victorieux ce soir

Nuages comme des massues
Abbatez votre grêle sur le petit peuple
Démons, de vos épées coupez et tuez
Les hommes de la terre supris


Incomplete love poem

Loneliness is a never ending winter
Sorrow is a cold and empty night
My heart is here, but yours will go
Your soul is here, but mine will go.

A tear is hanging on the tip of my finger
I