Why is love in a social definition something that has be to be shared by both parties, in knowledge and trusted shared common accord?
According to Merriam-Webster dictionary online :
Love as a noun is :
strong affection for another arising out of kinshipan assurance of affection
warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion
Love as a verb is :
to hold dear : cherish
to feel a lover's passion, devotion, or tenderness for
So if one feels ( transitive verb to handle or touch in order to examine, test, or explore some quality / to perceive by a physical sensation coming from discrete end organs (as of the skin or muscles) love for another someone - no matter how close or far the receiving subject is, what is the value of the thoughts or feedback of people judging and criticizing this phenomenon that ones lives and feels and has in a most sincere and honest manner in the depths of themselves ? Why is the fact that the recipient of these feelings is somewhat physically or socially distant, why is this fact holding such a great value upon judging something as elusive as feelings ?
I was chatting with a friend online, on MSN, tonight, and this came into topic. How the feeling of love cannot be true or real or acknowledged for someone who is not concretely reachable. And I ask - Why? Why cannot it be real - since the other one, the one judging - is not feeling the intensity and the depth of these feelings the same way the other party who holds and physically feels these abstract concepts in their very flesh and muscle (heart) ?
I once saw in a documentary that the simple color red, for instance, is not an exact science, since as much as there are humans, there are that many possible ways of seeing the color red, even if you give the same exact shade to everyone. The way each every single individual's eyes and brains grasp and interpret the information is left to each individual - so in fact, Test Subject A does not see the color red as Test Subject B does! And this is something down to earth concrete and simple as vision - sight - something medically and scientifically proven. So, if this is such a complicated and not so matter of fact poured in concrete science, how can we even begin to mingle the topic if feelings and judge them ?
Of course logic and common sense come into play - one might say, it is foolish and worthless, or a waste of time and energy - but if one would sit down and list all the activities humanity does which are strictly in the equation of survival completely useless and energy consuming, one couldn't argue much against wasting feelings. I will pick the Olympics for this. Do you need the Olympic games to live? No. You do not need need to break a record to be able to breath, eat, sleep and shit, and function as an individual in a society. You do not need, as a spectator, to see the achievements of this little minority in order to breath, eat, sleep and shit, and function as an individual in that same society. This is called a distraction, an entertainment.
So then - if one chooses to do an activity that is completely pointless for their surviving necessities, how can this one judge upon something as uncontrollable as feelings ? Even more so - the feeling of love - which strikes when the right combination of factors are met, and which factors can be fully acknowledged by the one "undergoing" or completely ignored.
Luke buys tickets to watch a sports events.
Matthew falls in love with a woman on the other side of the planet.
Luke watches the game and feels happy and feeling a strong emotion towards the team, towards the game and cheers for them.
Matthew somewhat interacts with that woman he knows he will never meet, and yet, is transported by her and has real feelings in his heart for her.
Luke will never shake hands with the players, or tell them they performed in a most outstanding way on the field and filled his heart with pride and joy.
Matthew will never hold that woman's hand, and tell she inspires him very real, deep, strong emotions which he has not felt for other women before.
How can one judge Matthew as being foolish and wasting his time ? He is transported and inspired the same way Luke is. In a different context and reacts towards a different medium - but both experience a strong feeling that cannot be catalogued or stripped into a proven mathematical or scientific formula, yet, they are very real in the core of their existence and effects upon both men.