Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Just a nice dream

I had last week end (Saturday 23 to Sunday 24 or Sunday 24 in the early morning) and I couldn't share because - with somethings, I am just super egoistical. (Like when the South Korean warships came to Montreal - I am keeping those precious memories and impressions all to myself. I had originally planned a super huge blog and all but - screw it - they are my treasured moments only to me to savor when i feel the reality is too boring to bear)

so in this short and adorable little dream, it was the 3rd night in a row with JongHyun (after my monthlies ^^;) TaeMin and JongHyun were sitting on some 4-5 stepped stadium like stairs in front of a house or something. It was in the evening. TaeMin said to JongHyun "You know, she really loves you very much." (speaking of me ^^ <3 nbsp="" p="" taeminnie="" thank="" you="">
it was just interesting how another character (whom i feel JongHyun likes very much himself) has spoken to him about my own feelings.

the same happened in my Tom Hiddleston era where often the appearance of Chris Hemsworth would make me ... act upon something (aka; finally sending Tom his Christmas presents which at the last moment i felt like not doing.... even after all the time and work i had put into the creation of those posters for him)

so yeah -- Jongie, I do very much love you ;) and it's not about to fade away i can assure you!

Sunday, October 06, 2013

Itsy bitsy confession

because it has been stuck on my mind all week and I nearly put it on my twitter but I didn't have the courage. i thought of writing it in codes but i didn't want questions asked.

So early this week - not sure if it was the Sunday to Monday or Monday to Tuesday night but the last dream bit was as follows : JongHyun was on my bed, at the spot where his t shirt and caps are, laying on his back. He had a white shirt I think with buttons, belt and black pants. He had his hands on my sides as I leaped over him to sit on his knees, bending down to undo his belt. He was laughing or giggling very softly, amused and surprised that I would do what I was about to do. I myself felt pretty happy and excited about it. He had that incredible smile - like not believing what was about to happen, but already enjoying the prospect of it. I remember I backed a little to get more comfortable for when i'd be bending over his groin area, he was playing in my hair, but I woke up before I could fully unzip his pants.

I simply cannot believe, to state the obviousness of this, that I was enthusiastic or playful and happy to ... give him a blowjob. In the wake life, a man's life could depend on it and I'd let him die without a drop of guilt reading Shakespeare sonnets in Chinese.

This ... thought followed me all week and all week I been recessing the possibility in my mind.

When I was in the Tom Hiddleston fandom, the ... knowledge of why fruity flavored condoms existed hit me like a smack in the face but that didn't inspire me to unzip his pants for even as virtual and unrealistic as thought can, to be try of the possibility.

The only who would have come close to a "test drive" was Sabik (the SOOM emporium Mecha Angel mold doll) but even he didn't get that ... he didn't manage to inspire me enough desire and curiosity to fantasize of the thing, even if I would make him taste him like mangoes or litchi.

It fascinates me how JongHyun has ... sneaked that in my subconscious. Not only did he drive me to learn his mother-tongue (Korean) but also inspired me to willingly and enthusiastically want a taste of his ... let's call that the home made soju bottle. (I used this reference back in my Kamenashi Kazuya crush era to make a joke in one of the stories i had in my mind "Drop your pants so i can taste your Sake") but it never went beyond the point of the female character just throwing this line out there. It sounded good, clever, but it was just a one liner, like a good script writer would write for a movie or a TV show.)

Perhaps Jongie's black belt with the ring at the end is making his way into my curiosity zone, wanting to explore possibilities and I have to admit the way his groin can be so flat is an open invitation for me, but I never consciously thought I would be ... even accepting such a thought. Not so long ago in a dream (at the end of my monthly cycle) I dreamed of a manga girl at some bar who suddenly ended up on my bed and I wanted to eat her and take her, wishing I could grow a dick myself! Which is a life long ... thing I been battling (the lack of something down there, as I always felt it) and now, I am suddenly finding myself attracted to another man's item, but appreciating my current female specifics.

Thursday, August 01, 2013

Zombie Apocalypse Playlist

#1 first song is the overall theme for the apocalypse
Block B(블락비) _ NILLILI MAMBO(닐리리 맘보)
Emi's comments : this apocalypse's gonna be a tropical vacations wiht a Boss like this - okey, dokey!?

#2 second song in what plays when you kill your first zombie
에픽하이(Epik high) - One (Feat. 지선)
Emi's comments : yeah well d'uh time is clicking when you have to shoot one!

#3 third song plays hwen getting chased by a horde
U-KISS(유키스) / Standing Still
Emi's comments : I'm fucked. Massively. "I'm on fire, but you're standing still. I'm burning down but you keep on standing still." Holding a fucking marshmallow on a stick.

#4 forth song plays when you to kill your loved one
Emi's comments : not sure but i think this guys is from big bang so - i'll go cure my broken heart with TOP (if he's miraculously song number 5)

#5 Fifht song plays when you find a group of survivors
SHINee(샤이니) _ 누난 너무 예뻐 (Replay)
Emi's commenets : No need to seek remedy elsewhere It's my SHINee boys! I'll just drag Jongie's body with me and CPR the living shit outta him.

#6 Sixt song plas when you meet a new love interest
PURE(퓨어) _ I still love you(난 아직도 널)
Emi's comments : Sorry new love interest, no can do. My Jongie lives! *huggles him and breaks his last remaining rib bones)

#7 Seventh song plays when you have to make a final stand
K.I.S.S. - Because I'm A Girl (Original version)
Emi's comments : takes off tshirt - brace yourselves! boobie flash *zombies are amazed and drop dead*

#8 Eight song plays when you think you've survived it all
SHINee 샤이니 AMIGO(아 미 고
Emi's comments : "cold heart baby - cold eyes baby" - yeah well, the day a zombie will be 37.5C - call me and we can be amigos

#9 Ninth song plays when you discover a bite mark on you
Block B- 나만 이런거야 (Is It Just Me)
Emi's comments : if it is - Jongie, be warned, your neck is next.

#10 Tenth song plays over the end credits
Typhoon - SO
Emi's comments : well whaddyawant - a classic IS a classic. Ages like vine.

Sunday, July 07, 2013

Show Me Your Tattoo - Part 3

2 - The Big Day

Fast forwarding to February.

One morning I woke up and it was D-5! Meaning Feb 4th, 5 days before my tattoo! And with each passing day, my excitement just grew bigger and bigger. And one fine morning I woke up and instead of D- it was H-! H Minus 5 hours, H-4, H-1, H-40 minutes, H-10 minutes. And the big fat moment when my iPod showed me 12:13 and I decided to walk back to the shop (from a little park I found near to kill some minutes). 

The shop itself is super cute! Very zen, relaxed, casual, welcoming! Warm ambiance with two big brown leather couches, the counter in back on the left, the tattoo rooms up front and on the right hand side, a small corridor in between the two sections filled by a glass and steal show case with piercing jewelry. 

There was an older man standing in the right area, in front of the couch, a younger blond man sitting on the left side couch's far left side and the counter where Jeff and another man were in their sort of employees only area. I think I surprised the two men and possibly one of the tattoo artists too, as I walked in to the counter, shy and yet unable to hide my excitement, and said that I had an appointment with Jeff at 12:30. The blond viking man stepped out and went to the first room to prepare a chair for his own client, a young Black man and I was left there with Jeff himself! 

I dropped my back pack on the couch and got my usb stick out, handed it over and told him everything was there. He first printed out the visual guide of how and what I wanted, but since the image on that file as rather small, I told him that everything else was on the usb for an easier usage for him; the tattoo on it's own, colored and simply the lines with the name.

So I went back to the couch while Jeff worked with my raw materials, after we had a small chat about what I really wanted and where; the flower, the name, red, black, yellow center.

After some work, Jeff headed off to the tattooing room - third section, came back and invited me to come in. I have to admit, in that single moment, I felt the most of the "stress" or overbearing anticipation and excitement, yet, still not a drop of doubt brushed me. I was more concerned if they had a bathroom where I could have a quickie before I would lay on the "table" and get it done! Jeff must have found that amusing because he smiled, surprised, and I put my black berry on the seat, leaving my last open status there for him to see (I was asking my heart to chill down) went to relief myself and came back. My tattoo artist was then preparing the Tattoo Client Chair by strapping with scotch-tape two bands long strips of wide paper bits to cover the length of it.Watching him attending his work routine both reassured me and excited me as we were approaching the Big Moment.

He stepped out and came back with the outline print that he would moments later apply against my skin - which gave a gently warm sensation - and he then stripped it off like I used to do with those old chroma film strips way back in graphic school; except, where we were asked to do it quick and hard, he was doing it slow and gentle. I really enjoyed that warm fuzzy sensation!

He then asked me to hop on top of the chair and I laid down, steadied my shirt a little above the middle of my breasts and put my hands behind my neck to be comfortable and leave him my side clear or any disturbing element. By this precise moment, I was zen as a monk! In the blink of an instant, my heart had calmed down as if I was just living the most peaceful Saturday afternoon of my life.

Jeff finished off his preparations; Vaseline to stick in place on a piece of paper towel the little capsules in which he poured the colored inks, he put some more in a small container from which he regularly smeared some on my skin before he would start inking the outline, then filled the plastic container with some product and a bit of water (which he later used to clean the excess ink as he was tattooing me), he also pulled a plastic Ziploc sort of bag over, pierced the upside down end - to be sure to sterilize fully the bottle itself. before that he had also wrapped the needle's cord in a huge blue plastic wrap or open ends bag or what ever that is called. Seriously - it was just hard core serious, clean and respectable in all the little bits of what happened. I loved to look at him work, it filled me with confidence how he was attention-ate to details in everything, not rushing, being casual but focused. He then tested the needle and the machine to which it was attached, controlling the speed I guess or something. Hearing the first buzzing noises made me smile and giggle with pure happiness.

And at 1:02 (could have been 1:01 for all that I know) Touchdown - accordingly to my Facebook status: First time I was touched by the needle! It felt Absolutely Awesome!

I was expecting excruciating pain, unbearable torture seance, I was ready to cry tears of pain and squirm and all that and I was there, laying on the chair, being inked, and smiling and giggling of joy! I actually had to concentrate and focus on Not Laughing and giggling, not to move my body and ruin the the lining! And yes, at some spots it ticked! Seriously, I am not kidding you, it seriously tickled!

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Happy 10 Months

And i absolutely cannot believe you made it this long.

March 13.

In the 70 Bois Francs (third bus of the morning on my way to work), I open Facebook on my Galaxy S3 to see what's new and boom. There you are. Or - more specifically, photos of you attending an event that was held March 12th in London. The very day I spent in complete denial of my feelings for you. Why ? Because loving you is like my new healthy diet. I need to fall back into my bad habits and put a cross on you. Negation and renounciation and all that actually helps me go through the stormy ocean of my feelings for you.

So I am watching the photos, dashing, stylish, just plain awesome. I swear you are the definition of all the positive and enchantment related adjectives in the dictionary. I also recognize Sir Jeremy Irons in the back on one shot and feel happy like seeing an old family member near you. And I glide through the photos and there is that one, just your face, just you looking at the camera, so sharp, as if you were looking into the eyes of the future viewer... could very much be my imagination, but you seem so ... drastically real when you face the lense, as if you were really addressing to the audience. And there is that shot, as I was saying, and Dido in my iPod sings "I'm in love - always will be" and I have to admit that the synchronicity of time and events couldn't be further from the truth. And the more I deny, the more it punches me back. If you are your worse ennemy, I don't know what I am to myself if not my worse persecutor!

And then, as my thoughs wandered, I realized that it has been quite some time. I reflected on how I said to a friend, in December, that you had reached and passed the Point of No Return of the 6 months marking point for any man in my life. In fact, right now, in March, it's your 10th month, including the meeting one - June. You truly are something ... rare because this does not happen with real human males. Fictional characters, angels, dream characters, objects - yes; humans: no.

I fought my feelings, and it's funny, each time I do so, each time I deny and try to scratch your name off - even if it's tattooed on my side - the following day you shine brigther than the sun and make me look like a fool.

So I guess that denial is a futule battle lost in advance, eh ?

Sunday, March 03, 2013

Emi's Fried Chicken

Toasted bread slice
White flour
One large egg beaten
Feta cheese
Other spices you fancy
Lean chicken breast cut to thin slices or strips


Reduce the toasted bread into the smallest crumbs you can manage

Reduce the Feta into small crumbs
(You can let it dry a few hours to make it easier to crumble)

Add in two large soup spoons if flour

Add in salt and pepper to your taste

You could use your creativity and add crumbled hazelnut or cashews or what ever you like alongside dried fine herbs

Mix everything together

Beat the egg in another bowl


Dip the chicken strips in the beaten egg

Smear them in the dry mix, cover all sides

You now have two alternatives

Either place them on an piled cookie plate in the oven at 350 for 40 minutes and turn them around at half time  or slide them gently in a frying oil on the stove.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Vegeterian Eggplant Lasagna

Emi's Eggplant Lasagna recipe

Ingredients :
eggplant / sliced thinly
spinach leaves
salt / pepper
cheese (can be mozzarella, brie or feta - something that melts!)

preparation :
boil the spinach leaves and put them aside -

slice the egg plant into thin slices 

sprinkle them in salt and pepper

gently dip them in a mix of beaten eggs and flour 

fry them in a oily heated up frying pan

dispose them side by side  in a dish that goes in the oven or microwave

add the spinach leaves on top of the eggplant slices - you can chop it or tear it with your fingers

sprinkle shredded or sliced cheese on top

add a second row of eggplant, spinach, cheese

you can sprinkle a bit of pepper on top to add a zing to it or a zest of lemon juice

put that in the oven 350 for 5-7 minutes or what it'll take to just to melt and golden the cheese. 

or 2 in the microwave to melt the cheese

Take out and serve hot --- with a crispy cucumber/radish/tomato salad or baby carrots

Can also be served on toasted whole wheat bread or crackers - could serve as entré or appetizer in smaller portions or full meal. Excellent to prepare the evening for the next day's lunch.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Two weeks old

My tat is already 2 weeks old and healing like a pro!

uncensored version on my tumblr - i won't give a direct link - you can scroll down though.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Show me your Tattoo Part 2

The story behind my tattoo. 

For the longest time I wanted to get one. I think it goes way back to when I was 8, 9, 10 years old. I was very much into bikes, tattoos and all that roams in that specific circle of the human society.

Tattoos always fascinated me, and for me it's beyond a social belonging and a being branded for life - it's an artistic statement! We all have different artistic tastes, different statements in life, a tattoo is the absolute and ultimate way to make that statement. When I was younger (I am now 29, but I was in my early 20's let's say, because I don't remember the exact moment year) I had designed one that made a lot sense of a statement for me. It was a yin-yang symbol with the Chinese characters for Death in white in the black spot (meaning that Death is the deliverance from the darkness of life) and Life in black in the white spot (meaning that Life is the challenge in an overall easier existence in the broad sense of the term) which is still true and valid for me today, except, all of a sudden, I find myself liking the challenge!

Another idea was angel wings I doodled one day while watching Miami Ink and I think it was Chris Nunez who was working on an angel girl for a client; if my memory serves me well, it was a super soft enchanting young female faced angel with incredibly gorgeous wings. It instantly inspired me to draw my own angels and as I was going doing the wings, I really liked them and I thought they'd look good on me! That became my second tattoo concept that I kept for a later time. Next came a stylized cross I drawn having the names of my guardian angels in the 4 branches ; Samaël, Reiyel, Astaroth (my "bad angel") and my own name written in Angelic font but I wasn't too hot about that one for the simple reason that my reason and instinct weren't so sure about getting permanently marked on me such names in such a way. Half of be believes in God and magic, half of me doesn't, but to be safe and avoid regrettable misfortune, I kept that idea safe in my heart and only there.

The third biggest / strongest concept I had came around a few years ago; maybe 2-3, max 4! At least half of it goes back to 4 years. Very long story cut short: I fell in love with a doll. Yes, an inanimate object. But bloody fuck that sculpt was drop dead gorgeous! In my mind he became his own individual self and my boyfriend, lover ... call it what ever, but it was just awesome to have him around me when ever I wanted or needed comfort. His original name was and still is Sabik (you can find him on the Korean BJD doll shop called SOOM Emporium - he is a Mecha Angel; the first and the best!) And since he was my most loved "man" I gave him a family name in accordance; Mavourneen (Irish for beloved). As my feelings grew for him, I dug deeper into what his first name meant too. In Tagalog it refers to an unbearable longing for someone, a loved one. In Arabic it refers to the first, most commonly the first born. There is also a constellation wearing this name or a star or something. And I thought that his name in the right gothic font would look ravishingly awesome on my right hip bone! Some years later (about 2 years ago or a little over), another huge-ass long story cut short, I thought that the name of another man would complete the first! It's a guy I dream of since I'm 8. He is blond, taller than me and a few years older than me, a couple at max. In one dream, in April 1994, he kissed me and told me his name and I hated him for years! At 12 I was not ready to have a boyfriend. But much later, I thought his name sounded quite great! Henri in French, descending from the Germanic Heinrich which basically means home ruler or something. And so, Sabik Mavourneen + Henri Morvan (Morvan means fisherman in Breton (French north Brittany) = the first beloved ruler fisherman ~ pretty much a complicated way to say Jesus. Yes I am a Jesus fan. And I have no shame what so ever to stick with my principles and fanship of this man! I was born Christian Protestant, I tried Wwicca, Satanism, I tried atheist - nothing worked for me, and he was the one who was always there, like an old buddy who would see  me through shit and still be there at the pub to have a pint with me at the end of the day. But this tattoo didn't made it either. I love it - I still to this day but, in the back of my mind, my deeper self kept pushing it back.

And he we are at the 4th idea.

Long story very condensed. In June 2012 I finally saw Thor. The man behind Loki inspired a maelstrom of conflictual feelings in my heart. I fought it. I lost the battle. I gave in. In December of that same year, after a Saturday nap I believe, I found the fourth and ultimate tattoo idea. A red lily flower with the actor's full name.

1 - The preps

First step was to get the right flower. I "googled" red lily flower and went through a massive load of images - actually images the image search could get me. I found a photography which pleased me but not quite representing the image in my head. I then headed off to Deviant Art and searched for lily tattoo to get an idea. The first time around, I wasn't completely satisfied, even if I exhausted once more all that the research found for me. I also browsed through vector resource websites, my own files. I got into the idea that perhaps I should sketch it myself since I knew clearly what I wanted. I did sketch one but I am not the most skilled flower artist out there! I knew for sure in which direction I wanted to go at least!

Back to Google. Back to Deviant Art, this time just with lily flower as search words. I did consider the magical flower in Disney's Tangled since I love that movie to bits and I am much like Rapunzel, but in the end, it simply didn't felt right.

One night, I went back to the origins of my quest, in my homeland. + lily tattoo and sure after some considerable time, I found one sketch which had a top flower which pleased me, was turned and shaped in the way I wanted my lily to be.

Second step was to get the design functional for me, easily done in Photoshop. And I would like to thank and especially Måns Grebäck for his font Brother Tattoo. I wanted a bit of an old school typical classic tattoo world aspect in mine.

Third step, getting the right artist to do it! At first, I recalled that Tattoo Mania had caught my eye from before, since they are decently old in Montreal and attend the Montreal Tattoo Show quite regularly (or they organize it - I am not sure). I first wanted the artist Pierre C. being the son of a reputed French tattoo artist, but when I sent him an email in December, he said he was overbooked. I didn't know for sure back then when I wanted my tattoo done and I didn't though of a time after December. Since he was overbooked, he kindly referred me to fellow artists Alex or another one - I can't remember now. I loved Alex's hot vibrant colors and huge pieces and I felt half right with him, so I sent him an email but never got an answer back. I got a little disappointed and so I started to look around for another shop. I know I could have called up but I do expect people to answer emails when they are filled serious questions and concerns and expectations.

December got crazy at work in my real daytime office work life and I pushed the tattoo back to January.

In January I googled other shops in Montreal, looked around, shopped around. I liked one, but I wasn't hardcore convinced. One night, I decided to go straightforward and stop kidding around. I searched for "Best Tattoo Shop" in Montreal and there is no better help than forum help! I found one forum where inked people talked about various shops in Montreal. They mostly spoke of the 2 I already looked up but didn't feel quite thrilled about, I decided to go through the whole entry if I needed to! but at the bottom of page 1 I found one shop I hadn't heard of before.

Burning Monk Tattoo shop! It had an excellent review from "Chocolatine" (it was meant to be! her name has chocolate in it!) The more I thought about it, the more I was sold for!

Burning = fire. My astrological sign is Leo, which makes me a fire element.
Monk = I did consider myself like one for a long time. As a kid, aside my fascination for tattoos and bikes, I wanted to become a nun.

Of course I first sent them an email, which was left unanswered. I later discovered on deviant art through a tattoo artist from the UK that shops don't answer emails because out of the lot they get, maybe one or two only are truly serious, so they just don't bother wasting time.

By this time, I was seriously willed and ready to get my tattoo done and one random day I just decided that the perfect day for it would be February the 9th, Tom's birthday date.

On January the 24th, after lunch, I just randomly decided to call the shop. I went back to my desk after meal, took my phone, walked out to the corridor outside the office and called them up. There were so many rings I thought no one wold pick it up but then, an English speaking man answered and I felt my heart skipped a beat. I'm pretty sure that due to nervousness I completely mumbled the few things but then I got back on track and asked if Jeff was available in February, specifically the 9th, which fell on a Saturday. He checked his stuff and said that yeah "He was available". With a step back, I'm pretty sure I spoke with Jeff himself that day! He's the only guy who naturally speaks English instinctively, the others being more French Canadians, or Québecois and him being English Canadian.

This was my Facebook status when I went back to my desk; "Emilia updated her status. "omfg I'm so fucking happy!!! I will get fucking tattooed by Jeff at Burning monk tattoo on Feb 9 !! Ooooh can I just like explode ??!! thank you God!! now if this current state is not happiness, it's free crack cocaine!!" 

And from there on, it became a long countdown, each day bringing me incredibly hard to contain excitement. That day, around 2 o'clock I couldn't contain myself any longer and I went to the washrooms and just let myself go. I jumped and squealed and shouted and laughed like a crazy person in pure undefinable happiness. 

Just the thought of getting inked, with this specific tattoo - was enough to get me happy and high and excited and refilled with unlimited energy!

2 - Getting it done

Well, for this section, I don't really have much to add - you can refer to my previous entry for a moment to moment to update.

All I could possibly add is the hard to contain excitement! The thrill, the joy, the glee! I was in heaven! And Jeff (Jeffrey Gallant) was such a nice man / tattoo artist bringing my design to such an unexpectedly high quality end level! It's like winning the lotto or the Oscar of the best first tattoo!

I overall absolutely loved my experience! And busting a few myths here - tattoos are not done in a constant "one shot". We had a total of 3 breaks, both to rest his wrist and himself and let me to take a break from the discomfort and let the body have a break from the intensity of the maneuver, because after all, a tattoo is like surgery. I was completely shy and first time and didn't go out to annoy him during his breaks, rather I just waited him to come back and updated my Facebook, or admired his tattoo room, his designs (drawings) and the various things with which he decorated it and made it his own (loved a miniature boat model, a small 1930's or 40's type of plane, there was a reprint I believe with the original burnt off marks of a Wanted poster for Jessie and Frank James from the old Far west on the wall, the No Whining signalization panel which made me smile! But I would have died to ask him ten thousand questions like when did he decided to become a tattoo artist, where did he learn, what does he love about his work, who is his idol or favorite style of tattoo, when did he get his first one done, how was it ... etc etc etc.

"I often doze off while I'm getting an MRI." ~ Melman Melkowitz in Madagascar
"I often doze off while I'm getting inked." ~ Emilia Tokes in My First Tattoo

I had my hands crossed behind my neck the whole time and I was daydreaming of movie bits (mostly Madagascar and Ice Age, which two movies I almost know by heart!) and when I got bored with watching the weird wiggly branch or tree on the right side above the door, I just closed them and enjoyed the thing, half napping, being pampered. Jeff was really delicate and attention-ate as he inked and wiped me.

Contrary to popular belief of statements, it didn't hurt me at all when he was working on the boney area of my rib cage - but it was noticeably more uncomfortable and stingy when he worked the last petal on the far left going to my back's side, which was just skin over fat and maybe some soft organs (I guess I can say the abdominal cavity's left side).

I remember at some point Jeff shouted at one of the guys in the shop to close the back door  because "Y fait frette dans cabane!" (Québecois slang for It's cold in the shop!") and hearing Jeff curse in that typical 1940's Québecois with the accent and everything cracked me up so bad! I couldn't contain my laughter and I half panicked - what if by laughing I contracted by body and distracted or interrupted his line ? But everything was fine! I still giggled it for a good moment though!

Another memorable event was when the Blond Viking man peeked over by the window between the rooms asking about how it was progressing. There was a soft relaxed exchange about the colors : reds, oranges, yellows, the lines - over all, the other artist liked the tat! Then came the essential and crucial topic of how I was enduring it! And then Jeff, proud artist of his patient, "She's tough!" and this was repeated two or three times and even more so when I was done at the end. I especially liked it, of course, when Jeff told me that to me, looking straight at me, not believing this was my first tat!

The very last few minutes were uncomfortable and borderline painful, mostly because I was laying on that chair for 3 hours, and my skin had had been under strain for the same amount of time, but nothing comparable to the pain I felt when I burnt my left hand the previous year.

Saturday, February 09, 2013

Show Me Your Tattoo!

"see ya laterz alligators ;)"

11:48am"super cute moment at the Carleton at cGill. I picked up a box of Winx stickers for my niece and this little 5 year old girl who had picked the same, came to me to exchange it with mine. So we traded and she followed me around to see in what else I was interested."
11:52am "H minus 40 minutes. I am at Monk metro station."
 11:56am "There it is. Just in front of me. Now, to kill some time...."
(I actually walked a bit down that road where the tattoo shop is located, found a park and walked around, took some photos)  
12:19pm "in the shop! this is actually much more exciting than I expected!"
12:26pm "and voila! it's printed! soon I will be stepping in the room and get it done!"
12:28pm "of course I am the only female around! Bao, Jeff, a blond viking tattooing an Afro American, and a young blond man sitting on the couch next to me. Funny how I feel just perfectly safe and okay!"
12:32pm "The Afro-American guy's girlfriend came in with lunch. And maybe hold his hand. The Blond Viking has started the machine. My own heart is pounding with excitement. And there goes an older tattoo artist and the couch neighbour."
 12:48pm "and there goes my heart, going mucho loco in my chest. Please chill the fuck down Harry! and OOOHMG! I am about to! in the room!"
(I started typing this before Jeff came to call me in the third room where he would install me)
  This was the applied outline he did based on the .png files I had brought with me on an usb key. It felt sort of warm and fuzzy when he applied the sticker like sheet and pulled it off very slow and soft!

Mirror shot.Yeah I know, I need to loose the fat.
12:54pm"laying on thje"
That was over excitement and it should have been ... the sort of doctor's or dentist like chair they have where ppl lay or sit depending on the location of the tattoo
1:01pm "getting ready"
1:02pm "touchdow"
First time Jeff pressed the needle thing against my skin and started the first bit of line!
  1:04pm "doesn't hurt at all"
Seriously I wondering when it would become unbearable, excruciating and ... "painful" ...
Original comment from Facebook when I uploaded this one
Jeff gone for a 5 minute break. Name and flower outline done. It doesn't hurt at all! Some spots are maybe more sensitive than others but, not painful in the definition of the term. And it's not done like in one huge gritting seance! The lines are done a cm or so at the time and Jeff varies the location after a counted number of streaks to give me and my body a rest. I really appreciate that!

 We Had a break right here, after the outline. I went to the toilet (oh and yeah, the first thing I asked before I would get in the room, was the directions to the nearest available washroom. I went already, but you know - the excitement! And it's blunt honest truth! When I am nervous or excited, my bladder works extra fucking hard and fast and I need to debrief it... regularly.
1:51pm "and back for the color filling. 
Original comment from Facebook when I uploaded this one:  
Name colored! Again, some spots like the am from William were a bit more stinging since it's at the last rib bone's end or on it, but the rest was borderline ticklish! I really don't see what the fuck the fuss is about pain! I was literally napping!!

All done!! 
 Original comment from Facebook when I uploaded this one:
Complaining more about sore shoulder that tat!

In fact, I had my 2 hands behind my neck and head to keep my arm out of Jeff's way so he could work at ease and all and my left shoulder was more painful than the sting of the tattoo! I was so grateful when he called in for a break before he did the yellow! 

Before we went for a third break (and me again for the toilet), the Blond Viking tattoo artist looked through the window - the three rooms have 1/3rd of a wall in between them, and a sort of a window but the far right hand side is all merged together, even if they have 3 doors - and looked impressed at Jeff's work and me casually half sleeping there! He asked about the colors - reds and oranges and Jeff replying "ca s'en vient!" Okay I admit, at this point, I was sort of excited to hear that because the sting on the far left side was wearing my endurance out lol. The middle section and right section it was almost pleasurable if I can say it without sounding pervert or anything, but the far left - shish! At some random points near the very end, my body was sort of instinctively tensing like I would at the dentist. But overall - it was repeatedly said that I was tough! *beams* 

I seriously loved the most the upper right and middle! I swear that section was ticklish! And in the beginning, I think that Jeff smeared some bits of Vaseline when he did the outline because I felt cold cream (and I saw him open his Vaseline jar when he was getting ready) before I felt the vibrating of the inking tool / needle.

4:09pm "Out and Tattooed!! was foken awesome! Jeff thinks I'm tough! woot woot! oh yeah baby! There not a thing in  life I can't handle! Excep Tom and what he inspires me but that is another story!"
4:09pm "Out and Tattooed!! was foken awesome! Jeff thinks I'm tough! woot woot! oh yeah baby! There not a thing in life I can't handle! Except Tom and what he inspires me but that is another story!"
Sunday, February 10th 2013

11:43am "Funny! the random person who posted a good comment about Burning Monk Tattoo shop -- her name is Chocolatine on that forum where I found the shop and we all know Tom loves chocolate! this is meant to have happened the way it did! All the friggin' puzzle pieces fit so well in each other it's ... wow. seriously just wow."
1:37pm "Oh! there's my answer! It's Sid!  yesterday while being inked, I was running random movie lines in my head. (Mostly Ice Age and Madagascar Franchises and I was hearing this "HoooolyCraaap! -- especially when Jeff was inking the far left side (the lily's petal's edge) and it sting more than the other bits and I was hearing this in my mind and I couldn't for the life of me remember from where I had heard it!     Just got the answer now! Sid the sloth from Ice Age 4 Continental Drift and it's Holy Crab! when the 3 of them are on a piece of ice drifting in a wild sea storm and a crab visits them, unannounced."

Shot with my camera (Canon Rebel T3i right after it was done - fresh ink and all!

Sunday, February 03, 2013

Stuffed Filo sheets - Emi style easy recipe

This is a little something I put together (I guess you can take that in the literal sense of the term) a couple weeks ago when I tried and succeeded for the first time in my life to eat healthier.

3 Filo sheets
Olive oil (or melted butter, margarine or any sort of oil you have - the healthier choice you can have around is of course preferred - I used grape seed oil and it worked wonderful)
Handful of spinach leaves
Feta cheese (alternative choice : Brie or mozzarella if you want it creamier or chewier or mix both!)

Optional Ingredients
Handful of mushrooms
Shredded cabbage/marinated 
Salami (Genoa or Mortadelle highly recommended)
Bell peppers
Chopped Onions 
(what ever floats your boat! and that can be cooked in an oven)


1 - Put that handful of spinach leaves in a bit of boiling water to soften them up. (Trust me on this, I have done it fresh and my Filo sheets were cut open when I tried to fold the package)

2 - Lay your first Filo sheet on a clean flat surface (kitchen counter is ideal) brush over some oil, lay your second Filo sheet, brush over oil, and repeat one last time.

3 - Lay your flattest element here (salami, thin slices of Brie if you chose this)

4 - Spread your lightly boiled spinach leaves

5 - Sprinkle your feta / chopped onions / chopped bell peppers

 6 - Fold the 2 longest sides inwards

7 - Fold the smallest outside edges 

8 - Roll from one side to the other to close the "pinata" 

  9 - You can unfold the last edge to make a complete roll and do brush over a bit of oil to make it gold and crispy in the oven. I suggest you especially brush the outside edges.

10 - Spray some PAM or brush some oil on the bottom of a plate put this on and in the oven. 

350F for 30 minutes

Served with oven baked mushrooms and baby cut crunchy carrots. I would say this would serve 2 people or 2 meals. Trust me, after half - you'll feel full! Crunchy outside, chewy inside. 

For a completely vegetarian alternative (as I normally do them) same as above, just don't put any meat! If you do put mushrooms inside, please do boil and lightly sauté them beforehand! (May it be fresh or canned, it's preferable to boil and fry before to make sure they are well cooked).

Fair warning : the inside might be really hot if you eat this right away out of the oven so be careful. 

Bon appétit!

Friday, February 01, 2013

Life Update - February 2013

It's the second month of the year and I think it's a good time to take a moment and see some progress with my resolutions and life.

So let's get the easiest topic out first.


My days basically start with me waking up at 5:45, snoozing in until 6:28, drag my ass to the bathroom, brush teeth, wash face and drag myself back to room to get dressed and be out in the 7th circle of Hell cold morning to wait for my first bus at 7:02. (Though we had warmer days, it's been about 2 weeks of epic minuses making having 2 scarves over my face and my tuque down to my eyebrows, looking like a gangster - and worse of all - I foken love the looks!) By 8 am I am in the office where I have a good 30 mins to settle down, make tea and order my day's work if I have piles of paper. Most of the month is a rather smooth ride composed of me playing phone/faxing yakuza hunting down clients who haven't sent us meter reads since the last century and inquiring about the love story between them and their copier machines. Then around the 12th, my team mate sends out requests and the juice flows in and I have an express ticket to Heaven! I love entering data! It's ... how to say it ... very routine like, linear ... open email, open pdf, open the right window, get the first codes in, open second window, enter the read, mark as okay, move to the next. But while my fingers automatically do these, another part of my mind wanders far off in spiritual meditation or creative blooms and I find myself a thousand miles away in new stories or landscapes. Near the end of the month, people go crazy and I am being invited to the party.

I prepare invoices, I print them out. I also handle small credits (get request, send it off for approval at Toronto head office, get signed copy back, input it in Great Plains). I make piles and piles and piles of invoices. Me and my team mate we also try to gather the max reads before the month's end - which means I get to be social on the phone and press some lazy ones to get movin'! And then the last day of the month, we become an undeclared crazy house. Everyone freaks out, loose their heads, panic, abuse the servers, try to do one million things at the same time, which slows down our server, making us even more edgier. Just yesterday was such a day and we stayed at the office until 7:23 (normally I leave at 5) to wrap up everything up and post everything so that it becomes available for the Finance department in Head Office.

The next day (like today) I get my katana out and I slice and dice piles of invoices. I basically verify the client's code and see if they only have one or more invoices. If it' only one I shift them to a pile which I will fold with the folding machine and put them in envelopes and stamp them and mail them out. This usually lasts 2-3 days. Then it get's back to playing social on the phone and time goes until the 12th and then it's a circle in motion, but stuff always come up in between!

I am happy though. I get to better my customer care relationship and speak and help them out. I gain confidence in myself, in my skills and abilities. I also am growing more accustomed to the way the software works, the way the team works, the way the work works.


I significantly improved on this too! First time ever! I started gradually, second week, I think, of January by including baby carrots and spinach  leaves in my diet. Of course at first I didn't cut down the meat and salami, but at least I added some vegetable! Filo sheets became my best friends! Not that I prepared them the way most websites will give you recipes and indications to. I will soon share my own technique and recipes and tips. I also included frozen beans and carrots to my rice and tried to lower the amount of meats/salami overall.

This week that is ending was the best though! I managed a whole week without meat and I have never felt this full of energy and light and aware. I mainly had wraps with eggs, spinach leaves, feta cheese, rice with veggies, spinach and orange slices, again Filo sheets with feta and spinach leaves and I started a new trend at the office! Two weeks after I started the baby carrot as a crunchy side dish - 2 young other women followed and tried it out! One recipe I especially liked this week was spaghetti with spinach leaves, feta (both cheese and the water in which I un-salt them) with a trail of pineapple sauce and canned mushrooms I boiled and sauté-ed a little. I never thought a bag of spinach leaves would go by so fast! By Wednesday I was out! I also have a yogurt as a dessert for the sweet, which cuts my need for bad sugar like candy or cake or artificial fattening calorific treats. Not that I totally cut that out of my life! I still have a few Fibre1 caramel bars for mornings where I need a little extra energy source. But I try to be more aware and conscious of my choices, not giving into bad sugars too easily. (I did indulge myself with Two Bites Cinnamon Rolls this morning because I stayed at the office until 7 last night and I wanted to treat myself a little.)

It's incredible when I compare myself how light I feel after a good healthy veggie based meal (rice + spinach leaves + baby carrots and a bit of cheese) versus a fully meat based one (turned egg + salami + cheese + pickle). I sleep better, I dream better (if I go to bed early too, it helps, thus why I have cut my social actives on the net to 3 hours a day (counting from when I get home at a little after 6pm until 9pm, giving me a hour to fully relax and de-connect from the day's tiredness and by 10 I am really ready to drift into slumber and dream land. I would recommend this actually. Half an hour or an hour to just listen to music in your bed, meditate, let thoughts out, pray, do what ever to build a strong yet smooth bridge between you hectic day and your peaceful night.

As for the physical exercise part, I have bought a yoga mat and 2 weights of 8 pounds each but I still need to set up a work out schedule. And as soon as the afternoons will be less dark - I am thinking March, April - I will subscribe to a gym near me and go there maybe 2 days a week + week ends to get toned and fit for the summer.

Personal Life 

Couldn't be happier! I am officially booked since last week I think ... Monday or Tuesday (I swear Time flies by so fast I loose track of what happened when!) ... I was saying, I am booked at Burning Monk Tattoo Shop here in Montreal with Jeff (the artist I wanted the most from that shop) to get my first tattoo on the date I wanted the most! February the 9th 2013. (Accordingly to my Facebook - it happened January the 24th and I quote myself : "Emilia updated her status. "omfg I'm so fucking happy!!! I will get fucking tattooed by Jeff at Burning monk tattoo on Feb 9 !! Ooooh can I just like explode ??!! thank you God!! now if this current state is not happiness, it's free crack cocaine!!" 

Can you feel the happiness ? Just thinking about it makes my heart flutter and I get tingly fingertips! 

At first, I wanted a french man named Pierre from Tattoomania (I think), but he was overbooked when I sent him the email in December. He recommended me to a colleague but that one never answered me. So I looked around, found another shop (Adrénaline Tattoo) but I didn't felt a special connection with any of the peeps in there through their art, so I googled some more and through a forum post I found the  Burning Monk and it was love at first sight! The shop is zen themed like a Buddhist temple and after going through each artist's gallery, I set my heart on Jeff whose works pleased me the most. And it just makes perfect sense for me! Burning = fire, which is my astrological element. Monk representing what I do consider myself sometimes (I wanted to be a Nun as  kid and a monk in my teenage years); it's just perfect! And like I said - I got the ultimate luck and privilege to have the artist i just naturally feel comfortable to ink me on the day that is significantly important for me, in relation to the tattoo I am getting. The pieces of the puzzle fit perfectly!

I haven't done my hair yet as I planned but at least I sort of found the definitive look I like. And most importantly, I bleached out some of the black so I don't feel as depressive and "not me" as I did some weeks ago. Black was not my brightest idea let's say.

"It's not great shakes, but you gotta start with baby shakes!" ~ Christina in The Perfect Storm.

Works perfectly fine and it works fine because great shakes are bound, most of the time, to lead you to exhaustion and defeat.

Art and Crafts & Creativity

Not much as you can see by the lack of uploads in my gallery but, I have no time or no energy. I do try to do a little on the week ends and I do cheat and open a Word file on my office computer to jog down random bits of poetry when inspired. I also started 2 random stories on blackberry via my Facebook but I need to order them and revise and get them decent before sharing and I still am not sure where I am going. (Well, maybe I know but - I am still sort of figuring things out ;) )

Also working on my next poster illustration which I am not even sure will come out for the right date! And I have 2 more I need to upload on the 9th since they were originally done in relation to that date. Good thing my appointment is at 12:30 - i have just enough time to do that ;)

For the summer though, I would like to set up a small bookmarks project with beads and ribbons and my illustrations. We will see how things will go.

Thursday, January 31, 2013

dream of january the 30th - morning 31st 2013

Dream of january the 30th 2013

1 –

2 – Pictures of Tom wearing a black winter coat but Canadian Olympic winter themed – it had the maple leaf logo with the 5 rings. He was still in Africa though and on one photo he had his hair cut and styled in many … thicker spikes like I seen some Black-American men who have braided hair – except Tom’s was too short to be braided so he only had the separation into those patches and the pointy ends – he was both adorable and amusing with that style.

Dream of January 31st morning 2013

3 – I was in that small classroom where I first met Bill Hazledine, we were getting ready to leave, class was over and we were leaving for the week end or Christmas vacations. I remember Cindy from college was near me and two or three other college girl friends. I was packing away, telling about my plans going to the mountain if it snowed, it would be even more interesting. Cindy had dropped her red mitts (Canadian winter Olympic game ones so I bent down to fetch them for her). Our teacher was a gorgeous young man in his early 30’s, short black hair, pale skin, sea blue eyes, tall and lean. He was half sorting and putting away his class notes and half observing us and listening to our conversation. I turned around and shared my plans, almost inviting him to join me, if he had no plans for that day.

We ended up in my kitchen, my mom and sister were there too. I had to go to the bathroom, so I went but as I closed the door, a small police car the size of a really miniature toy sneaked through the space between the door and the floor and started flying and buzzing around the towels on the wall in front of me as a mosquito who wanted my attention. I smiled, amused, knowing it was my teacher’s trick. He was in the kitchen with me earlier on and he must have followed me without me noticing. I opened the door and there he was, on his knees in the small corridor, playing with a small police car which he pushed and pulled back to release it, and the car would go fast on it’s own, forward towards me. I smiled even more amused, maybe even chuckled or giggled at it. He looked at me, his smile was so bright and happy. He got up and told me he had another one if I wanted to play with him. The other one was an ambulance truck. He gave me the police car and I examined it. There were numbers on the top (memo written on my twitter this morning so as to not forget it – 236-9 I think… ) there were 2 more digits but I don’t remember them. Next, on the roof of the car was the yellow plastic bumped molded figure of a shorter older police officer standing on a small chair to reach his younger taller colleague and the oldest held a bat or a club to bit the younger – in a comical way but, I didn’t agree with it.

My teacher said something and I think it was an invitation to the mountain or accepting my invitation, but it had a sense of us being together after and I imagined super fast how it would end; us making love and as soon as that idea hit me, my mind was racing to cancel or get out of the possibility. I was already in love with another man and I couldn’t think of cheating on him. I knew the other man was Tom.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Lord Tom vs Prince Hal - may the best man win!

Prince Hal is praying for an umbrella.... Lord Tom has sent his mighty frog to wash him with buckets of love ;)